How To Look for a Babysitter

Welcome to Moms Talk, a weekly discussion on Woodstock-Towne Lake Patch that is part of a Patch-wide initiative to reach out to moms and families. Each week in Moms Talk Q&A, our local Moms Council of experts and been-there-done-that moms take your questions, give advice and share solutions.

Moms, dads and grandparents who make up our community, feel free to ask any questions you may have about parenting—whether it be about neighborhood schools, the best pediatricians, childcare or teen dating.

Moms Talk Q&A will also be the place to drop in for a talk about the latest parenting hot topic. Do you know of local moms raising their children in the Tiger Mother's way, and is it the best way? Where can we get information on local flu shot clinics for children? How do we talk to our children about the Tucson shootings?

If you've got a question, post it in the comments or e-mai lindsey.davidson@patch.com. Got an answer to a question you see posted on the site? Chime in and add a response to the comments section.

This week's question:

"What should you look for when selecting a babysitter, and what is a good rate per hour?"

Ashley Cantwell: First of all , it depends on whether or not you are considering home childcare full time, day care center or a sitter for "date night".  I'll choose to answer for a sitter for an evening. In my opinion, for a "date night" situation, I would ask friends who they would recommend first if I did not know of any myself. Then I would interview the sitter to see if he or she connects with my children. Also, if they plan to interact with them with either games or crafts instead of constant talking or texting to thier own friends. 

It would be important for the sitter to know CPR and basic first aid and who to call in an emergency.  I would also want this sitter to assist my kids before bed, to clean up any mess they have created and then make sure everything is put away,after the kids are in bed. After my children are in bed then the sitter is free to text and talk for the duration of the evening.

Michele Caldwell: Hiring a babysitter is one of the most difficult things you will do as a new parent, even as a seasoned parent. As much as you don’t want to leave your child behind, there will be times you simply must. It is not like it used to be for earlier generations. They could simply call upon their mothers, grandmothers, and extended family. However today most of us live far away from that family, and often don’t know anyone well enough to even accept a recommendation.  So what to do?

It is necessary to put significant time and effort in finding a good babysitter. It astounds me how much research and forethought people put into buying a new car, yet they will hire the first young lady who answers their babysitting ad. It isn’t because they don’t care, not usually. It is because they simply don’t know where to start. Let’s face it there are numerous books, blogs and places to go for information about cars.

There are several places you can find interested babysitters. I suggest you start with your church. If you do not attend church, you can still call them for suggestions. This is where I found my sons’ favorite sitter. You can also call your local high school. Counselors know these teenagers very well and can give character references. Another avenue is to ask your neighbors and friends who tends their children. Remember to ask their children which sitters are their favorites.

Where ever you find them, my best advice is to spend time with the person you want to hire. Ask detailed questions regarding how they would handle emergencies, separation anxiety, even simple boo-boos, and do not forget to learn their feelings about discipline. This is a very important issue that even couples cannot agree upon. Let your child or children be a part of the interview.  If they don’t like the person, do not hire them–period. 

The first time you hire someone, let it be while you are still home. Let them watch your children while you take a bath, pay your bills, or tend to any chore that requires your full attention. The next time, let it be for a short trip to the grocery store or library. Don’t be afraid to come home early and surprise them. I found one sitter sound asleep and my boys running wild when I ran back home because I forgot something for a party. Remember there is no science behind this. You must follow your instincts and those of your children. 

Once you find a good babysitter, pay him or her well.  In 1994 when minimum wage was $4.25, we paid $7 an hour for three boys.  We always rounded up and often tipped if they cleaned, or it was excessively late.  Ask your friends what they pay and offer just a bit more. Babysitters go first where the pay is best. Then they go where the children are best behaved, but that is for another day.